So it has been 5 years since I last posted on here. My last post? About an ex. Scary seeing how wonderful/amazing I thought he was. Yes at first he may have been. Things change. Not always for the good.
After a month I met his kids. They seemed fine at first. Then things changed. I was yelled at, beat on, hit, scratched, strangled, belittled and stolen from. Honestly just treated worse than dog crap on a shoe. It took me over a year to get the courage to leave. Once I did it was like a huge weight lifted off me.
I'm still hurt by that relationship. I ended it 4/10/2016. I have only had 2 short relationships since. I just can't seem to make anything work anymore. Maybe I'm too damaged. I'm not worth the time or effort. I'm too depressed. Too fat. Too ugly.
Do I want too much from a partner? Maybe. But I have standards. I'm tired of being used. For sex, money, a place to live and a taxi. Do I need to leave town to find someone? Maybe. But I won't. I can't leave my mom, my family or my job. I'm way to shy for that.
I have no idea where this blog is going. If I'll keep up with it. Right now its just a jumble of thoughts. Feels good to get it out there. Even if no one reads. BTW I can't spell and sometimes have bad grammar.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
Total Pageviews
Popular Posts
-
So the other day I, due to me being purely stupid, ended a good friendship. I really wish I could take it back. I now know that I'm a co...
-
I hate being me at times. Okay most of the time. Maybe that's why I'm single. How can anyone like me if I don't?? And why do m...
-
So I went and talked to one of the pastors at church today. I really opened up to him. Cried a little. It really felt good. With my depress...
-
So I opened a can o' worms. I emailed someone back. You know the guy I slept with then the next day he told me he was going back to some...
-
What the hell is wrong with me? I just hear Gary Allan sing "Best I Ever Had" and thought what if Kev was the best I ever had? Doe...
-
I keep thinking about my past. How I keep setting myself up to be hurt. Why do I do it? Do I secretly enjoy it? Had an amazing dream last ...
-
So I'm feeling really blah today. I have also been feeling really alone in the world. Even with my best friends by my side doing things,...
-
I'm at a point in life where I want to change. For the good or bad I don't really care. I just need a change in my life. I'm too...
-
Just having a horrible day. I feel like I'm plummeting into a deep dark black hole. The sad part is. I feel like that's home. That...
-
First off I don't say any of this to offend anyone. If you get your feelings hurt easy DON"T READ. If we meet on a dating web si...
About Me

- Suki
- I am who I am. I'm a boy crazy girl who loves life. I like frogs, tattoos, and scrapbooking.
Followers
Powered by Blogger.